Squirt A Little Seltzer Poem by David Whalen

When life gets too serious
When the fun seems to have flown
When mystery’s no longer mysterious
When the daily grind has ground to the bone

Just….
Sing a little song
Dance a little dance
Squirt a little seltzer
Down your pants

And if there’s no light
At the end of the tunnel
If you feel squeezed e’er so tight
As if poured through the end of a funnel

Just…
Stick a big red ball on the end of your nose
Paint a big red smile to the tip of your eye
Stand on one foot and strike a ridiculous pose
Plop your face smack into a big ol’ cream pie

When life makes you just want to lie in bed
When makin’ a livin’ seems impossibly tough
When feelin’ kinda green about bein’ in the red
You’ve got to do as I do and say “enough is enough”

And just…
Sing a little song
Do a little dance
Spritch a little seltzer
Down your pants