Seventy Four Poem by Jared Bukowski

Seventy Four



I asked my dog,
Why is it that you cry?
What responsibility do you have?
All you do is eat and sleep and die.
He looked at me laughing,
You think you do much more?
All you do is eat and sleep,
And die at seventy four.
No, no, I shook my head,
My life is full of thrill!
Of course I cannot enjoy it,
Without my morning pill.
He laughed again,
You've got it all wrong!
You're lifeless in society,
And you have been for far too long.
You plan for the future,
In this two story tomb,
And you go to work,
To suffer interminable doom.
Your marriage isn't special,
Nor is your place.
Say that you're important,
And keep a straight face.
Your life has been wasted,
Dependent on a clock,
Which one day will tick,
to find you under a rock.

And so I realized,
That all I do is eat and sleep,
And die at seventy four.

Sunday, July 13, 2014
Topic(s) of this poem: life
COMMENTS OF THE POEM
Georgina Murray 02 December 2016

Amazing concept, loved the conversational aspect of this poem and really enjoyed its wittiness. *My humble opinion* personally I feel this would poem would be stronger if the ending came back to the dog - perhaps a slight bit of repetition from the first few lines, or just simply another questions posed to the dog? ? - I know you've not asked for feedback, but I feel this slight alteration would strengthen this poem tenfold - apologies for any offence I've caused Jared. It wasn't intended.

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Suman Kumar Das 13 July 2014

Very practical............depicted in an innovative way..............thank you

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