My pain grows deeper
In every moment of your absence,
But when I think
That for every day I am missing you,
There is a day you are missing me,
And that you may be feeling pain
The same as mine,
I forget myself,
I drown myself deep in thoughts,
Wondering if you ache for me.
I miss you so much,
Crying every time you walk away
After we have met again for just a moment,
But when I think you may be feeling the same,
When I imagine you may be crying your tears,
I feel the worst hurt I have felt.
My pain grows deeper
With every passing day,
But I notice you grow sadder, too.
The face that was once
The embodiment of joy,
I have slowly watched become
That of a lost puppy.
And I wonder, am I what you're looking for?
Am I what is missing?
Am I what you seek?
And one more wonder,
Why do you grow sadder?
Is something missing?
Is there something you have lost?
I am here for you,
But you don't know it.
I want to make you feel better,
To feel better, myself,
But how can I make you feel better?
We haven't spoken a word between us
For so long I'm forgetting your voice,
But for as long as we may be apart,
I can never forget your face.
I see it in my thoughts and dreams.
And I wonder,
Are you sad?
Are you sadder, even, than I?
For everything that makes me sad,
Are you feeling sadder?
For every day I'm missing you,
Are you missing me one day?
For every tear I cry,
Are you shedding another?
Are we sadder than each other?
Stephen Carey's Other Poems
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Edna St. Vincent Millay
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(November 9 - 1937)