Rich Man Vs. Ghost....[religion; Humor] Poem by Bri Edwards

[the following is an account of the confrontation one evening between an honest rich man, call him 'Rich Man', and a mystery figure, call him 'Ghost', who appeared unannounced and asked Rich Man why he had no wife or children. I guess, in rereading the poem, that the Rich Man was/is a Scientologist! i have altered the poem to reflect that.]

honest 'Rich Man':

'Oh mystery guest, I care not to breed;
time's too valuable to sow my ‘seed'.
Money's my own evil, like cotton has its weevil.
All I really care about is greed.'


'Rich Man' is warned:

'All money you can save you can take to your grave,
but in Hell you'll still be scorched toast.'


Rich Man thinks:

ooh! scary ghost (NOT) !


Rich Man to Ghost:

'You're not so clever.
You'll find I have no panic lever.
L. R. Hubbard did say 'rich men, live for today.
Scientologists live forever'.'


Ghost retorts:

'I have discovered what became of your L. Ron Hubbard.
He told a mighty tale, but his beliefs did fail....
.... to keep him out of the Devil's cupboard.'


Rich Man responds to Ghost's retort:

'I believe you're a liar. I think your tail will be on fire.
I would not hire you... to fix the sole of my shoe, ...
let alone 'my Soul'. You conspire! ! '


Ghost gives up! (almost) :

At that the poor ghost his head did scratch,
thinking, perhaps, he'd met his match.
Then he saw the TV. He put on channel 666,
and Hubbard's broadcast, from Hell, they did catch.


thankful (soon-to-be-formerly-rich) Rich Man to Ghost:

'Ghost, I NOW DO believe you indeed! !
You can leave now on your steed.
But first take my money and bring me a ‘honey',
for I find I'm overdue to breed! ! '

(1-22-2006)