Relapse Poem by Austin Lockwood

Taking time just to breathe
Sometimes this life I cant believe
I'm looking for a brief reprieve
From feelings that I want to relieve

Sometimes I just want to escape this place
To avoid the problems I need to face
And now it's a high that I chase

I know better than to think it will help the problem
But right now I feel like I can't solve them
I'm looking for a chemical solution
But it's obviously not a sane conclusion

My so called solutions cause for harm than good
Do the right thing, I know I should
I know that I could
were I stronger I know I would

But under my own power I tend to fail
From my best laid plans I tend to bail

Maybe there is a God to whom I could turn
But right now I'm content to just burn
Ignore the pain I will learn
For this pain I'm sure that I've earned

Sometimes I enjoy the heat
It keeps me on my feet

I'll be fine for awhile when I get that high
Then I will be content to not even try
So in this moment I'm checking out,
Goodbye