Midnights Voice

Rookie - 794 Points (November 3,1950 / Selma, Alabama)

Red Canvass Of Life


1971
When I was 21
Unfulfilled dreams
Were bred, then bled out over time.
Time drips by the second from the icicles
Of my sorrow

The winds of Africa
Bring rain and destruction
To my gulf sound

Blue... covers the canvass
with dark reds, and space to fill,
The brushes are stiff
From improper cleaning.

58 days til' next year...1972.

California is calling.
But I don't want to go.
The grass is bluer at home.
The grass has red canvass strokes
From such useless sacrifice

Submitted: Wednesday, August 28, 2013
Edited: Thursday, August 29, 2013

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Poet's Notes about The Poem

caught in rememberance of a fallen Vietnan Marine.
PFC William Le Grande Dawes (June 24,1950 - October 19,1969)
I have received feedback on the word canvass which is my fault.
I use canvass which means to survey your surrounding as an image of my looking back on a life cut so short.
And the use of canvas as of a physical painting does not occur.
thaks for understanding
thomas

Comments about this poem (Red Canvass Of Life by Midnights Voice )

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  • Rookie Shalyn Stachmus (9/13/2013 8:35:00 PM)

    I am 21 now...this bleeds emotion, as I'm (hopefully) sure that's how you wanted it to be. Mighty words from a beautiful poet. I wish I had known him... (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 155 Points Ellias Aghili (9/13/2013 10:27:00 AM)

    its a colorful poem dear Thomas. very nice.
    it makes a feeling for me, remind me the nights of a light city far from here. a light city that people inside it know the meaning of love, know the meaning of friendship, know the meaning of humanity...
    a world of our own wishes...of our own beautiful wishes....
    perfect.. (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 13 Points Whisperkwane Lamb (9/11/2013 4:40:00 AM)

    Date of Expected Return from Overseas DEROS...wow..creedence clear water and james brown...head up and head down...that canvass must have legs...or it is following me...I thought I DEROS'ed years ago 173rd Airborne 3rd of 319th Bong song and hue...you put something my mind...that
    I have wish to forget...but I see now that i should not...1967 will be on every canvass in this world n matter what...you did a great job..sir...and I thank you...my fallen brothers...are fallen no more...my heart has picked them up...thanks again...sir... (Report) Reply

  • Veteran Poet - 3,790 Points Lyn Paul (9/10/2013 8:32:00 PM)

    A moving tribute, so well expressed Thomas along with your notes. Thank You (Report) Reply

  • Rookie Eden Panotes Orbista (9/7/2013 10:35:00 PM)

    very well depicted, the vision, emotion ran through and felt the pain, sorrow of the Vietnam war Veterans, a great way to remember a fellow, i salute you.....it is okay Thomas, we can use any word to visualize our thoughts and works... (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 2 Points Louis Cecile (9/7/2013 8:46:00 AM)

    The title is such an excellent way to describe the sacrifice of being a solider. A poem poignant for any form of conflict. (Report) Reply

  • Freshman - 1,170 Points Vera Sidhwa (9/6/2013 10:39:00 AM)

    You depict emotions beautifully and colorize then too. I feel the sorrow from your canvas that depicts it. (Report) Reply

  • Freshman - 1,283 Points Ken E Hall (9/5/2013 7:16:00 AM)

    Painting word with was of damnation in sorrow too of Vietnam and its useless loss of life, I remember before that war the French ended their rule with war and were beaten out of the country by the people who owned the land but the fear of communism was the cause of the useless loss of life...so sad...regards (Report) Reply

  • Freshman - 2,273 Points Patricia Grantham (9/4/2013 3:22:00 PM)

    Yes conflicts does have its devastation. Loss of lives in order
    to gain freedom or some semblance of it. A very intense and
    emotional write which I received with a grateful heart. I have a
    poem called Salute to Soldiers. Take a peek when you have time. (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 421 Points Shahzia Batool (9/4/2013 9:20:00 AM)

    the welcoming rhyme: 1971
    When I was 21, the welcoming image: Time drips by the second from the icicles
    Of my sorrow, leading to a series of other images all brilliantly used...! ! ! (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 88 Points Payal Parande (9/1/2013 9:41:00 AM)

    some thinks from mind
    some thinks from heart
    some thinks of hate
    some thinks of love
    but you are mastermind
    who pours your mind heart hate and love
    on the beautiful portrait of your poetry (Report) Reply

  • Rookie Princess Lilypad (9/1/2013 2:29:00 AM)

    wow, cool metaphor usage. canvass, canvas, reds like blood. blue like California skies? I need to read this again now that I understand your double meanings. I love snapshots in time. this is just that. tragic time. (Report) Reply

  • Gold Star - 33,905 Points Aftab Alam Khursheed (8/30/2013 10:35:00 AM)

    Hari Smith Holms has commented I think He is absolutely right I can't comment better than brother HSH thank Hari thank you Midnights Voice away from vice thank (Report) Reply

  • Bronze Star - 6,337 Points Neela Nath (8/29/2013 11:51:00 AM)

    The grass has red canvass strokes
    From such useless sacrifice - - - - - -so nice expression! Those two lines have condensed your grief, your bitter feeling against warfare in a beautiful way.Fabulous! (Report) Reply

Read all 27 comments »

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