Presidential Impeachment Poem by Terence George Craddock (Spectral Images and Images Of Light)

Challenge a popular president.
Clinton impeachment?
Successful re-election campaign.
Strong approval ratings?

Clinton received less
than 50% of the popular vote
in both Clinton elections!

Independent counsel investigation
that failed Whitewater land deal!
Sure got dirty swiftly took Bill Clinton
clean over the uncovered rapids!

Firing White House travel agents
the alleged misuse of FBI files?
We can sweetly sweep under the carpet
call it in house policy! National Security!

But Bill’s alleged sexual harassment lawsuit?
Filed by a former Arkansas government employee?

Oh me! Oh my! De Paula Jones
issue! Won’t lie down and die!

During de course of de investigation
Linda Tripp trapped de lying rat!
Not with anything cheesy but
with tapped phone conversations!

Young Monica Lewinsky a former
insider White House Intern!
Taped discussing having oral sex
with President Bill Clinton!

Here comes de amazing part folks!

Can you believe at de deposition!
De judge ordered a precise legal definition;
of de term ‘sexual relations’! Like amazing!

Why did he not just use de precise
authority; of a dozen or so dictionaries!

Instead de judge deferred, acknowledged de merit!
Of Mr Clinton’s judgement! Wise opinion! Deferred!
To superior knowledge! What a galloping gallant!

Cause Clinton! Dat dictionary writing professional!
Claims! Construed ‘sexual relations’ to mean only Carnal
Knowledge! Vaginal Intercourse, to impolite folks!

Next time a judge needs; a precise meaning!
Of just two little words; or medium sized words!
Hire me TC only a cool; million bargain price!

Save de American taxpayer a 69er million!
$70 million for de Starr Report dirt!
Is just a little tad steep don’t you think folks!

By de way Carnal knowledge, is de archaic legal
euphemism, for de sexual intercourse, ya know!

De inflated problem in de meaning arose!
From de much-quoted statement!
In Mr Bill Clinton's grand jury testimony!

Did I get this right?
Testimony showed Bill
questioning the precise
use of the word ‘is’!

Believe it or not! Bill said,

'It depends on what the meaning
of the word 'is' is. If the—if he—if 'is'
means is and never has been, that is
not—that is one thing. If it means
there is none, that was a completely
true statement'. Yea right Bill S!

Can you believe dat! Whatever dat means!
Me thinks you all needs! A Clinton Arkansas!
Law license ta properly speak like dat there!

Meanwhile way back at dat de
independent counsel investigation!
Dat hound dog on de job! Starr has
obtained! Further evidence of Clinton’s
Philandering! Romancing ways!
By seizing de computer hard drive
de email records of Monica Lewinsky!

Based upon a good sniffing over
of Clinton’s conflicting testimony!
Starr followed de trail all de way
home! And concluded that Clinton
had indeed committed de perjury!

Not grand theft auto! Don’t think dat cheap
back in dem there cheap seats there folks!

Starr published, de K9 findings, lurid details,
de gutter fodder for de late-night comedians;
& political opponents leaked de sordid titbits,
to de press, naughty violation of legal ethics!

Why did de Starr report, include de lengthy
pornographic descriptions, which were
humiliating yet irrelevant, to de legal case?

Dat Expensive Political Porn Spinner!
Getting his rocks off at taxpayer expense!
Now back to de House for de verdict!

Clinton’s Impeachment
de House Judiciary Committee!
An de House as de whole
voted to Impeach President Clinton!

De Impeachment proceedings
were initiated during de lame duck!
Post-election session outgoing
de105th United States Congress!

De held floor debate
in de whole House?
Reportedly spirited
on by both de sides!

What were de vital statistics?

Clinton Impeached December 19 1998!

By de House of Representatives
on grounds of perjury to de grand jury!
(by de majority 228-206 vote!)

Obstruction Of Justice!
(by de majority 221-212 vote!)

Two other articles of impeachment failed!

A second count of de perjury in de Jones case!
(by de 205-229 vote!)

Accusing Clinton of de Abuse of de Power!
(by de 148-285 vote!)

Upon passage of de H. Res.611 de Clinton
entered de Presidential Hall of de Defamed!

Clinton became de first elected U.S. president!
De second U.S. president in all ta be impeached!
Following de footsteps of de Andrew Johnson in 1868!
Finally making de mark getting de very first place!

Richard Nixon was smart enough to resign de Presidency!
Before de infamous House impeachment vote in de 1974!

And de official public citation reads!

'Bill Clinton, President of the United States, was impeached
by the House of Representatives on December 19,1998! '

Acquitted by the Senate on February 12,1999!
(First he is guilty! Now he is not!)
So he is guilty or not Dizzy Lizzy?
Those Senate Old Boys Really Like To Pad Their Seats!
That’s like feathering your own nest right Lizzy?

The charges:
Perjury! Obstruction Of Justice! Malfeasance In Office!
All arose from de Monica Lewinsky scandal! De Paula Jones lawsuit!

What does de trial proceedings
were largely de partisan mean?

It means politicians rarely vote upon personal integrity!
It means most politicians vote in line with party loyalty!

And de final placings in de hard run race were as de follows!
Ladies and Gentlemen collect your wagers please! No more bets!

No Democratic Senators voted for de conviction!
Only five Democratic Representatives voted to impeach!

In total de 55 senators voted for de not guilty!
And de 45 voted guilty on de perjury charge!

De Senate also acquitted on de charge of de obstruction!
It was de close run split decision folks!
You cannot get any closer than dat folks!
And de final tally was de 50 votes cast as de not guilty!
And de amazing 50 votes cast as de guilty!
Second Impeachment of de US President in de American History!

How did de Senate vote Dear Lizzy? Dear Lizzy?
According to de Hyde Declaration Dear Terry! Dear Terry!

Chief prosecutor Henry Hyde declared:
'A failure to convict will make the statement
that lying under oath, while unpleasant
and to be avoided, is not all that serious...

We have reduced lying under oath to a breach
of etiquette, but only if you are the President...
And now let us all take our place in history
on the side of honor, and, oh, yes, let right be done.'

Really! That’s really really really what he said!

Meanwhile back in de real world? ? ?

Contempt of Court Citation

About de little old two months later
after being acquitted by de Senate!
In April 1999 de Clinton was cited by de
Federal District Judge de Susan Webber Wright!

(Finally de real judge and de real justice!
After all de months jumping through de
government hoops dat de male circus!)

For civil contempt of de court for de Clinton’s
'willful failure' to obey de her repeated orders!
To testify dat truthfully in de old Paula Jones
dat Arkansas sexual harassment lawsuit!

'Sexual harassment is intimidation,
bullying or coercion of a sexual nature,
or the unwelcome or inappropriate promise
of rewards in exchange for sexual favors.' Folks!

We have been in de so many sticky legal terms!
Where is all dis sleight of de hand!
Sleight of de mouth all going to finally end folks?

'For this citation, Clinton was assessed a $90,000 fine,
and the matter was referred to the Arkansas Supreme Court
to see if disciplinary action would be appropriate.' Folks!

Remember de Clinton 'is' speech January 17 1998!
I dink it was de 'is' deposition a de lying one anyways?

Any de way where he was placed
under de oath de judge wrote:

'Simply put, the president's deposition testimony
regarding whether he had ever been alone with
Ms. (Monica) Lewinsky was intentionally false,

and his statements regarding whether he had ever
engaged in sexual relations with Ms. Lewinsky
likewise were intentionally false....'

You gotta just love dat plain honest talk folk!
Love it keep it fight to retain dat always folk!

Political Fall Out: De Aftermath!

On de day before leaving de office in de January 2001!

'Clinton agreed to a five-year suspension
of his Arkansas law license as part of an
agreement with the independent counsel

to end the investigation. Based on this
suspension, Clinton was automatically
suspended from the United States

Supreme Court bar, from which he then
chose to resign.' Only de President is
above de law! Gonna be big problem!

Civil Settlement with Paula Jones

And it came to pass dat eventually de court
dismissed de Paula Jones harassment lawsuit!

Before trial don’t you know? On de grounds
dat Jones failed to demonstrate any damages!

Dat sneaky Paula Jones! While de dismissal
was on de appeal Clinton entered into an
out-of-court settlement by agreeing to pay!

Paula Jones $850,000! Cause Jones knows
you gotta take de money run with de honey!

So somebody got to live happily ever after
cause da went to litigation and finally won!

Back in Kiwi Land the people say!
'Not all politicians are liars.
It is just the other 99 percent
who give them a bad name.'

It is not just an American problem!
It is a global worldwide problem!

Finally in de immortal words
of Porky Pig dat Looney Tune!
'Th-Th-Th-Th-Th-... That's all, folks.'


Copyright © Terence George Craddock
http: //www.poemhunter.com/terence-george-craddock/
See also ‘What Is A Cigar? ’