Lonnie Hicks

(www.lonniehicks.com / Chicago Ill)

Poor Humor


Humor Relating to Being Poor- Chicago Style
We were so poor that eating out in winter was snowball sandwiches
We were so poor we had possum slices in our lunch-pails.
We were so poor that the mice brought us cheese.
We were so poor we ate air sandwiches every night.
We were so poor that we had sliced bean sandwiches, just one bean
We were so poor we had dirt on stick in our lunch-pails.
We were so poor we that the coal in our stocking at Christmas was a snack
We were so poor that when a fly flew in our mouth, we swallowed.
We were so poor, we made sauces out of our own spit.
We were so poor we thought airplanes were UFO's
We were so poor in our family that DNA tests didn't work
We were so poor we would take turns licking the spoons
We were so poor we took turns resting in the oven for heat.
We were so poor that people had only four fingers when they tried to stuff themselves on the last bean left.
We were so poor that my sisters hid bread in their hair for later.
We were so poor that finger-licking good was real without the chicken
We were so poor that every night we had mayonaise sandwiches
We were so poor that we had rabbit paw for dessert.
We were so poor we evicted praire dogs from their burrows for the extra space.
We were so poor that the wolves brought us sheep
We were so poor that we sucked the leather off baseball gloves
We were so poor that every morning we had sugar sandwiches for breakfast.
We were so poor that friends took the shirts off their backs and we made snacks of them
We were so poor that the church mice took up collections for us
We were so poor we ate the apple page in Genesis.
We were so poor we put a little salt on the apple iphone and munched.
We were so poor we caught bees, ate them, and hoped for honey
We were so poor the cows ran away
We were were so poor that the termites in our house were on welfare.
We were so poor that in winter going out to eat was slush balls and snowmen.

Submitted: Thursday, January 16, 2014
Edited: Friday, January 17, 2014

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