Ph: Oklahoma: Father: Hidey Holes Poem by Brian Johnston



Where did you find safety when you were a child,

Did flight also help you, I wonder my friend?

I felt like it did me, but that was because

My mom didn't try hard to suss her son out.

And having no fear of dark criminal plot, 

With empathy showed to usurper of laws,
And faith (that rule testing would not be my end) 
,
She brought moderation to my running wild

.

A freestanding tub was my first hiding place,

Its sloping backrest left a child sized retreat

That served me quite well until seven or eight.

When arguments scared me or Mom's tears would fall

My cave offered shelter away from it all.

A chance for the terrors of day to abate,

A child you can't see is quite hard to mistreat,

But adult frustration's not known for its grace.



My folks' bedroom closet, clothes hung below shelves, 

The naked light bulb with a string hanging down,
A door that closed tight though it had not a lock,
Just turned out to be unassailable space.

For on the top shelf they could not see my face

Small boxes that helped other's vision to block, 

A climbing wall route up eight feet was its crown

I'd patiently hide while the misdeed dissolves.


When younger I felt that my home life was tough

The rules of my father were simply not fair.

But most things that scared me today seem quite mild.
Still, parents are overlords; there's no defense, 

And parental judgments can miss innocence.
For few trust the protests of complaining child
While word of an adult can seal an affair,
With childlike convict, better served as plaintiff.

If you are a parent, please try to be true,
Have faith in son's training, trust him to do right,
Your child's not a stranger, don't treat him as one,
Don't teach him to think and then childhood forbid.
I might have been small but was rarely a kid.
My Dad was not evil, but killed so much fun,
Like Father before, work all day, sleep at night.
But whatever happens, I won't be like you.

Please God, let this stanza end curse if it can….
Your faults made me fear my own heart! Tragic plight!
And kisses, I swear, oh just where did they go?
Your hugs, not full bodied, your stiffness with that,
For physical comfort best buy dog or cat!
No man born more honest and not just for show,
The jobs you created, a light in the night,
Few parenting skills, still, I honor the man.


Brian Johnston
April 17,2015