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Soren Valentine


Passively Tearing Me Asunder


As I love the summer's breeze, so too do I love you.

And as it lifts my eyes to the Azure of the Heavens,

you grasp my hand ever so tight.

Upon the fields and downs green you lead me to and fro,

to a shady glade hidden from the sun.

There you spread your leaven,

as your hand sinks into my skin, becoming apart of the water,

the ocean of things to come.

You've caged my heart, arming the door with immovable objects,

barring my veins from blood.



And I just know that I loved you, as you forced me to do for years,

but you just couldn't let me free. I tore myself from you,

as if tearing off my own flesh, and bled until I was reborn.

I truly loved you; you were the only person I cared for.

Eternities seemed to pass, yet I finally broke free.



But now you come with your seductive smile,

your eyes glowing with the light of a nebula,

your skin, the silk of Heaven,

your voice, the nectar of the gods,

your embrace, divine equilibrium.





I once loved a summer's breeze,

but now it only reminds me of your hair flowing.

I once loved the feel of grass on my feet,

but now it only reminds me of the days we'd lay in it.

I once loved the leaf-filtered sunlight,

but now it only reminds me of the days spent in the forest.

I once loved the waters of the earth,

but now they only remind me of your forsaken tears.

I once loved the the stars ancient,

but now they only remind of the soon-to-be bygone years.

I once loved you, O my friend,

but now you only remind me that you will never love me.

I once loved myself,

but now you're the only reflection I see.

Submitted: Thursday, April 25, 2013
Edited: Wednesday, September 25, 2013

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Comments about this poem (Passively Tearing Me Asunder by Soren Valentine )

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  • Rookie Kieran J96 (5/17/2013 2:16:00 PM)

    Well as you know I love this. It's amazing how you blend your descriptions together to form the lines that you do. The poem itself is good but the language that you use within those lines creates such images, it's that skill that makes this beautiful. (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 17 Points Sandy Player (5/4/2013 2:38:00 AM)

    My 1st thought was here we go, another love poem. I find love hard to understand and find it baffling that most poems relate to it. But the images you used and the development/pace were astonishingly enough to allow me to lay off my prejudice and appreciate a very well written poem. Pictures like barring the blood from the veins, and the consistent juxtaposition of the object of love to the cosmos were sublime. Whilst there is effulgent and loquacious beauty in and around starry and nebulaic space, it is also a mind-cripplingly distant abd unacheivable, unreachable beauty and I think that makes it tbe perfect picture for the object of love. The pace was never lagging and it did not rush either, it was spot on. Very good, very good indeed. (Report) Reply

  • Rookie Alla Simone (4/28/2013 9:24:00 PM)

    I like this a lot. Fierce & intense imagery conveys the feelings very well. Some highlights for me are:

    You've caged my heart, arming the door with immovable objects,
    barring my veins from blood.

    Eternities seemed to pass, yet I finally broke free


    I once loved the the stars ancient,
    but now they only remind of the soon-to-be bygone years.
    I once loved you, O my friend,
    but now you only remind me that you will never love me.
    I once loved myself,
    but now you're the only reflection I see.

    Those parts stand out to me because the are eloquently expressed, yet they retain their relateableness.

    My absolute favorite part is:

    But now you come with your seductive smile,
    your eyes glowing with the light of a nebula,
    your skin, the silk of Heaven,
    your voice, the nectar of the gods,
    your embrace, divine equilibrium.

    You can 'hear' the poem more loudly in those lines than in the others, to me at least- if that makes any sense LOL. (Report) Reply

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