***paradise-12-Fat Man Dies Poem by Coach Roth

Maria worked weekends
in a geriatic ward
of another hospital...
her first long time patient
was a fat man who
weighed 500 pounds.

The nurses were taxed...
baths, changing sheets.
turning him over...
everything was magnified
by his size...

'My god Coach'
Maria said with that inflection
that indicated sympathy...
'he's humongous...
but such a nice guy,
kind of like Peter Sellers
trapped in a fat suit.'

Over the weeks,
they grew close...
talking at night...
passing the time...
she took him flowers,
he showed her pictures,
they laughed at jokes.

Then one day,
he introduced her to
his family...
beautiful wife, lovely daughter
respectful son, a loving group...

Fat man: 'Maria takes care of me...'

Wife: 'Thank you dear...'

Maria was proud to be his friend...

One night the code blue blasted...
Maria was first in the room...
the fat man was flat-lining...
no time to wait...
Maria was only four feet eleven..
110 pounds...
she lowered the railings
but still couldn't reach him...
she jumped on the bed
climbed on top...
straddled the fat man
started CPR...
pushing, pushing, pushing
pushing...
'Goddammit...
don't you die.'
Maria had never had
a patient of hers die...
'Goddammit...no...
not you...not the first...
goddammit no...'
She pushed and heard
ribs breaking,
knew she
couldn't stop...
'Dammit...no...
dammit noooo...'

The doctor on call
reached the room
found Maria
on top of the fat man
bucking like a bronco...
he gently grabbed her
and lifted her off...

'Whoa...little cowgirl...
he's dead.'

'Sh*t...goddam' sh*t'...
Maria broke down and cried...
and she hated crying
in front of others...

Coach
'You did what you could...'

Maria
'Not enough...not enough.'

'You're gonna be
a nurse, get used to it...'

'Never...' Maria said...
'Never.'