Opshopitis Poem by Francis Duggan

She could not pass an op shop by she suffers Opshopitis
A disease that in many ways is worse than hepatitis
With garage sale and Op shop stuff her house is full she is second hand addicted
The hoarding bug has bit her bad oh pity the afflicted.

Those who visit her I have been told don't go short of surprises
Her rooms are full of cuddly toys and dolls of all shapes and sizes
Her wardrobes full of Op shop clothes and Op shop mugs hang from hooks on her kitchen ceiling
Yet she seems happy all of the time and her charisma is appealing.

Her husband the poor silly bloke he looks a bit distracted
To chidings of a mate 'tis said he once over-reacted
When his mate said his wife suffered Opshopitis he became quite offended
And in a bar room scuffle their once good friendship ended

She cannot pass a garage sale or Op shop by the second hand dealers they all know her
And if she's not inclined to buy some bargain they will show her
And she will say I will have that she suffers Opshopitis
A disease that in many ways is worse than hepatitis.