Nobody Knows Poem by Nika McGuin

Nobody knows that my wounds
from our last fight
were more than physical
I was left feeling
anger upon
embarrassment upon
hurt upon
confusion

I felt so weak
as if my punches -
as if I- were all in vain
In my moment of weakness
he seemed to grow stronger
as if aided by some demon power

Time sped up
the room began to spin
a sure sign
that all control had been lost
this was the climax
to end all climaxes
the place I never
dreamed of entering
but was shoved into

Now I was yelling
trapped inside a mist of confusion
thick like soundproof walls
utterly lost, I'd all but forgotten
my reason for coming this far
but no, the one yelling
pushing me from behind is him
and the word 'nappy' has never
sounded so brutal

The war ended
and I swept away the dirty
mess he'd made
still, I remain
angry upon
embarrassed upon
hurt upon
confused

Nobody knows that my wounds
from our last fight
were more than physical
I've tried to find the words
to explain it to them
why my body is fine
but I am in pieces
its because I loved him
too much it seems
a loner will cling
to whomever comes their way
I claimed him as family
alas, it was not his forte

~Nika