Neela Nath


No Star I Can See


There is no star,
Which I can see
From my window...
Boundless darkness
Is here in the
Chest of night.
The painted sky,
I saw in the daylight
Now is wiped away
As my last poem
I wrote but made
it vanish from
The page, because
It couldn't tell
The blank story,
Of my desolate
Life...no star
Still is visible
From this window..
Someone has spread
The melted pitch
On the road of my
Moped sky..I stare
And stare all night.
The caged breeze,
The starless sky
And night, none can share
My loneliness, I know
They are no living
Persons like me...
But, they can drown me
In complete void of
Sea of utter darkness.
One star can do this;
Only one star......
Thru my little window,
It's flickering light,
Can fill my dark room,
With its heavenly touch!

Submitted: Saturday, June 30, 2012
Edited: Sunday, July 01, 2012

Form:


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Comments about this poem (No Star I Can See by Neela Nath )

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  • Freshman - 1,626 Points Ken E Hall (8/19/2014 11:11:00 PM)

    That star was the light at the end of a dark day sadness with gladness great to read...regards (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 340 Points Captain Cur (7/4/2012 1:00:00 PM)

    Brilliant, touching, sad and mortal. A wonderful write.
    I hope you find your star! (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 6 Points Connor Whyte (7/1/2012 10:06:00 PM)

    Very impressive beauty in stars can express many things I see in stars as a new world a light that can guide our ways. (Report) Reply

  • Rookie Theo Williams (7/1/2012 11:30:00 AM)

    Well written! I like the hope/light at the end. Very nice. Thanks for recommending.


    Williams, T. (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 3 Points Shouvik Roy (7/1/2012 9:50:00 AM)

    there is darkness in the beginning and light at the end, thats the job of an artist, to find a solution, lovely..liked it..loved it...: :) (Report) Reply

  • Rookie eloida Capuno (7/1/2012 4:31:00 AM)

    I am drowned in your sea of loneliness, but wait i saw a flicker of light from a distance. This could be the star you are searching for! You write so well i can feel i am near you in that window. Keep writing NN your work is always something to look forward to. All the best! (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 936 Points Unwritten Soul (6/30/2012 11:36:00 PM)

    Look there Nilakshi, there is a new born star..could be a new hope for life...Even there's no star be it as yourself..shine and bright others....so nice to share...i can feel this poem though, keep writing NIl! _Unwritten Soul (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 0 Points Kasia Fedyk (6/30/2012 12:32:00 PM)

    Oh Nilakishi, this is absolutely beautiful, it is breathtaking and I feel so much when I read this. Only one star that is upon you with its Divine Light it shines through you in its completeness. Always! :) Love (Report) Reply

  • Rookie Jeremiah Adediran (6/30/2012 12:10:00 PM)

    The piece is great Nilakshi, I like it. The arrangement, pattern and formation is brilliant.
    However, I'd have to scrutinize the lines pretty well to be able to underscore constructive criticism.

    P.S. I think you may add a little hyperbolic contrast;
    'My loneliness on my sleepless pillows,
    I know there...' (Report) Reply

Read all 13 comments »

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