No More Plans Poem by Hasan Haskovic

Counting up the struggles
Numerating eternal pretenses
Little movement leading to infinite answers
To the things I had to do

To know how to feel
Without anticipation of fear
Knocking on my door
I'd have to look back
Back when the light burned clear
Through the residue of lost charm
I'm tired of all the harm

Just...just try to listen
Listen for a change
And don't draw meaning from context
Read the things written on the mirror
Every wrinkle, every scar
A memory without alternation
Wishes assigned to a dying star
In deep nights filled with hesitation
Never thought I could get this far
This far into silence
With the wicked indifference
Devoting to dying mementos

Not sure what they're named
Those spaces between seconds
Made to recall why I'm so ashamed
Sweet innocence of being human
Neither happy nor sad
Just blackness you can't illumine
Broken and whole at the same time
Fear not the sublime
And don't expect a blueprint for sympathy
It had died with ages past

Maybe the point is to embrace what I feel
To core of sadness in my wake
Without toppling headlong onto it
Assuming it will define your days as a mistake
The fear gains quality in prevention
With thought standing wall to wall with intention

What will become of the sunrise
If the day will pass in light or snow
Is not what defines the emptiness of time
But simply the traits I've been found lacking
While swimming in the dust and the grime
The Sun spectating in slow burning humor
No empathy under the distraction
The screaming is no overreaction

Loneliness
A horrible, profound way
To understand transiciency
And just our lack of functionality
When it comes to shedding tears
It comes and leaves in a moment
Which makes you the most lonely thing in the world
It's okay, as long as I'm concerned
Doubt is okay

Can't seem to cope with all the suggestions
Of the innumerable ways to end the night
To end the torment of dying dreams
So these broken halves could re-unite
And start a new chapter on a new page
Black and white

A genius of sadness
Separating it in countless strands
Appreciate the subtle nuances
At least pain understands
My heart, a prism
Made to divide grief into an infinite spectrum
In the nature of my dualism
I have learned to live under pessimism
And in the attempt of unstoppable hate

Silence is all that I can appreciate