- My First Proper Standup Routine: : Humour Poem by Alessandra Liverani

I've written funny poems, written a heap of those
But sometimes all that rhyming gets up people's nose
So I thought I'd try proper stand up and use words which didn't rhyme
I enrolled in a stand up comedy course to become a stand up comic sublime

The first task we were given was to write down ten things that we hate
Should be easy I thought, but could barely think of eight
Then we had to write down ten things which made us feel afraid
Rebecca said the fear of revealing fears was one which on her mind weighed

Our teacher Rob, likes his lists of ten and I couldn't expostulate
Because even if two were crap, you still had the remaining eight
This is going quite well I thought, and I'll no longer sound like Pam Ayres
Because, quite frankly, the stuff she does, does anyone really care?

We listened to a bit of Derek and Clive, comedians from the past
And I have to say their humour still packs quite a blast
To call the buyer of their record a fool, well they didn't quite use those words
And then play a few moments of silence, is the funniest thing I've ever heard

So I hope you like my attempt at not putting everything in verse
I've just done a proper stand up routine, and you heard it here first!

(Sydney, Australia - 2010)