Murders (Based On A True Story) Poem by Kiera Coffey (12 year old)

Murders (Based On A True Story)



A true story about the De Feo murders at 112 Ocean Avenue in America, when the eldest son in a family, Butch (presumed to have a mental condition) shoots all the members of his family in a late night killing spree. He started with his parents, then his two sisters, finally his two brothers. He was later found to have no mental condition whatsoever and was just a cold-blooded murderer.

The sound of his father’s shouting,

Still echoed through his mind.

But after just a few quick shots,

He’d leave all that behind.


He took out a gun from under,

His messy, dusty bed.

He loaded in the ammo,

The bullets made of lead.


One shot, two shots,
Then they’d be dead for sure.

The silent ‘sleeping’ bodies,

Their blood making pools on the floor.


Next door he shot his brothers,

Their names were John and Mark.

Only a few hours before,

They’d been playing in the park.



All the time Butch smiled,

A menacing, evil smirk.

He enjoyed killing his family,

And grinned at his handiwork.


Four down, not finished yet,

He’d gotten on a roll.

Next he went to his sisters,

Each like a porcelain doll.


Allison woke to find a gun

Pressed against her side.

She looked around her bedroom

There was nowhere she could hide.


Her face glowed white in the light of the moon

As she watched her brother approach.

His rifle was mounted on his shoulder

And he shot without reproach.

POET'S NOTES ABOUT THE POEM
written for a school homework. My teacher said it was good and that I should publish it so I decided to put it on here. I would appreciate any advice on how I could improve the ballad.
COMMENTS OF THE POEM
Saadat Tahir 12 June 2014

very nice....indeed you have a nice poem your teacher was so right keep writing...you have it!

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Darlene Walsh 10 May 2014

I've heard of the Amityville Horror but didn't really know anything about it, until now. I just read the story and it was truly horrible. I thought your poem was very moving, enough for me to Google it. I wasn't sure about the mom from your poem, I think you could make that clearer. And maybe getting the gun (2nd paragraph) would be better before shooting his dad (1st paragraph) . Your ability to bring words to life is very good, please keep writing.

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Susan Lacovara 08 May 2014

Was this about the Amityville house? I grew up in Massapequa, not far from there....a true horror story that a family was slaughtered by an evil hand. You should continue to write, all the time, poetry has a passion all it's own. Good job. PEACE

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