Lonely Poem by Miss Fairytale

Tonight my name is lonely.
Dressed up in bed clothes and black bag eyes,
I tried to make it tidy, it got all messed up again,
An ache only a woman can feel creeps up and down my lower back as slow as the icey wind outside.
I'm dreading tomorrow, I don't know who it'll be, I hope they'll be nice to me
Treat me like a snowflake, don't bother looking, it doesn't matter.
Been looking at pretty faces tonight, planning tomorrow's warpaint,
I don't want to go to battle, it's so tedious
Wake up and catch a bus, try to concentrate and off I go,
Expect tomorrow's going to be different, they're coming to my home, going to invade my space
What will they ask me? I don't want them here.
Now I'm going to curl up in my bed and watch some mind numbing television,
Should have curled up earlier, the bags will only grow.
Tonight my name is lonely.
I just want to be left alone.


29th February 2004

[ The first time they took me to 'see someone'.I got a counselor with eyes that moved independently of one another. It was difficult. I didn't talk. ]