Life For Me Poem by yabadabadoo

The blade softly touches my skin,
Just a slight prick and all is lost.
It slides away leaving a gap in both my skin and heart.
Inside of my blood I release my pain.
My ache.
I feel each line that needs to be cut so that is what i do,
the thick red beads on my skin,
and grows.
My sly tongue tastes the bittersweet iron
Never before has pain felt so wonderful
so alive
Each slice grows blurry
And i feel the tears dancing on my face,
trying to sooth the hate i have in me,
the hate i have for me.
I put everything away.
i fold the bloodstained papers
And hear each clink of the razors in my little moon box.
Why? i ask,
I can not blame my family
or my friends so i blame
myself.
My mom calls me a happy girl,
my breath pauses in my lungs,
so little she knows,
so little she can know.
each time i change my hair I try to find a new me
but i am left with only a different color pain.
My heart grows smaller and my tears larger,
and so i continue my life
with a hole inside.