Jailer Of A Love Poem by A Waltz For Zizi

I'm ready to die now
but I'm not really going to die, am I.
I'll just kill my self in order to become a man of the lie,
the kind of hero you seem to adore,
and the ultimate villain of my hate.
It's not you, the reason.
You're just the motif of everything I'd like to write.
It's not easy, but I've decided (I think) ,
I'm not gonna hold up this mountain of a love anymore.
I'll blow it into billions and billions of pieces,
and I'll make myself a castle out of it
to jail love.
The walls will be painted in hues of blue,
as they are your favourite.
But as I just told you, it's not for you.
I just want to be what I'm not.