It Finally Matters Poem by kira kira

i sit alone, wondering why
why am i still here
why am i hiding
these voices remind me of my fear
why im still fighting
crying
im still f****** dying
cant you see
my pain is screaming for help
im trying to do right
but tonight im just crying my eyes out
i wanna give up
i know i gotta pull through
for you
i gotta get better
or this life wouldnt of even mattered
but its so hard
just to not do it
the stinging, the bleeding
f*** im just messed up
f***** up insane
i just need some f****** pain
ill be good, til it goes away
then i gotta start again
lets just pretend scars arent there
theyll fade, fade away
like my memory

tell me im okay
say things will change
your right
ill do right
ill get better
i just gotta write this one last thing
but im still trying
ill stop all the hurt
i never meant t cause you any pain
i just wanted to get rid of things
that never seemed to go away
but its ok ill do better
for you
you care
no ones ever cared
your there
no ones ever been there
i know for the first time
it finally matters