I'Ve Loved Unloved Poem by Iris Mista

They do not have to see
All pain bothering me
If I only stay here
no more pain and fear

Surviving with loads of pills
Being able to pay all bills
Open my eyes once a day
Close them at night if I may

Unaware of the emptiness
All hope and longings I miss
That big hole that is solely me
what not is can not be

Totally done with therapy
No more past I want to see
Pain tearing me so apart
So many and no way to start

No, do not see all my pains
Screamingly running through my veins
These are all my tears to cry
In loneliness, don't know why

Don't know why…

Really, I don't know why

I know my life is over and done
Still here for my girls and son
Yet there is no real tomorrow
Eaten alive in my land of sorrow

It's me, I eat my soul away
Forgotten pain is here to stay
Never will it leave and die
I've loved unloved, don't know why

I still do

Don't know why

Really, I don't know why

December 6th,2013