I Look Back Poem by RIC BASTASA

dusty pages of a bundle of papers
i untie them
so i can look at the past

honestly, it could be
that i was at fault
or simply you ruining my
life somehow like
a broken piece of
glass
a dainty dancer
tiptoeing on a mechanical music box
on broken heels

i read again and again
and the pain
comes but it is not that as painful
when you first come
into my life

you claim that both of us are broken
i answer with my silence
for years
and there will be more years
for this silence
still

you offer your hand in friendship
no, i will not receive it

i could have been so civil in my manners
like anybody else
but you must have not noticed
something that you cannot
find in me anymore

i have lost my face and it is not within your power
to ever replace it

i will be honest before my God
and i may be wicked and
too vindictive

i still pray that you may find your soul
still burning in there