I Am The Lesser Of Me Poem by Ace Of Black Hearts

I don't know why but I feel there is a ghost standing next to me.
His head held higher.
Like he is better version of me,
A presence so perverse.
Introspection.
A mirrors, mirror of a reflection.
Double vision.
Accomplished and successful.
A man not so desperate to just make it.
Crawling on the inside just to feel alive.
Touching the live wires just for the pleasure.
Give me pain, give me something.
A man so weak.
So scared.
A little boy in the corner crying.
Falling into a dream.
But it is not me.
It is not who I ever wanted to be.
A monster in human skin.
Flesh with no soul.
Where is my bodies control?
A constant convulsing.
Violently shaking.
Blurry tears do drip.
Each one is a near miss.
How much do I have left.
Time factory of mass production.
Seductions lips speak of the untouched and untasted.
I have not yet lived.
An absence of birth.
A plague, a disease, a dirge.
Long ago these paths walked diverged.
He is my hero.
The better man I can never be.