I Am Not This Fabulous By The Grace Of God Poem by hollie ash

i am not this fabulous by the grace of god
it is perhaps because i made a deal with the devil
i was not born with inner strength
it's just that you make it through the tough times or you don't

i didn't make a good decision one time, or a thousand
but i did make something out of nothing once or twice
i see that all that glitters isn't gold
that band on my finger almost killed me, that's how i know

i still don't understand the purpose of risk
but i do know that sometimes you jump or you die
i cannot take back anything i've ever said
and in the long run i only regret what i've never said aloud

i cannot predict the future and i've forgotten much of the past
but right here and right now i exist and that is my legacy
i am imperfect in every second of every day
and that is about the only thing i can honestly promise you

i think of the world as my oyster and my outhouse
and in return i am nourished and fertilized
i am not this fabulous because of a deal i made with the devil
i am fabulous just because i am