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adheez van der beanthz

Rookie - 34 Points (27 May 1980)

Humanity Extinction

if humanity
measured and weighed
with amount of money and donations
in the name of profit and fame

if humanity
seen as an investment
commodity to gain sympathy
for getting votes and seats

if humanity
to be an excuse
so the sounds can be muted
and differentiation be generalized

if humanity
used as a target
where weapons directed
and bullets fired without load

if humanity
legalize human body
as a good and service
on behalf of hierarchy and culture

if humanity
justify human life
as a legal tender
for a brighter future

if all that happens
around us today
it's time to prepare
face the humanity extinction


Submitted: Tuesday, March 12, 2013
Edited: Tuesday, June 18, 2013

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  • Rookie - 33 Points Mark Dillon (12/22/2013 7:00:00 PM)

    Very well put, yes humanity has been used and adused in all of these fashions and continues to be on daily But we have to belive in the good in this world. there is a lot but media seems to favour the negative, good writing. (Report) Reply

  • Rookie Kelly Seale (6/12/2013 7:29:00 AM)

    This piece struck me, as it should all who read it. Very profound and heartfelt. I enjoyed it very much. Great Ink! ; -) Kelly. (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 67 Points Bright Morn (6/11/2013 7:17:00 PM)

    A very good poem with great message, really if we all human, the social being, continue to become so much selfish and individualize then the humanity may extinct, a very good poem indeed (Report) Reply

  • Freshman - 2,239 Points Patricia Grantham (6/11/2013 4:43:00 PM)

    This is a real good poem on Humanity. We as members
    of the human race can become so individualized that we
    fail to see the whole picture. Until we come to realize
    that we are not alone then we may just become extinct.
    Your use of sound instead of speech on line eleven in my
    view does not change the context of the verse. Well said. (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 34 Points Adheez Van Der Beanthz (6/10/2013 7:48:00 AM)

    in response to input that Ace given, what I mean by line 11, especially from the word sound is a parable of the freedom of speech that silenced
    might be more appropriate if I use the word sounds because it is plural
    more than that, I appreciate the feedback given where it gives a different perspective which of course provides many lessons for me
    thank you very much friends (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 134 Points Danny Draper (6/10/2013 1:04:00 AM)

    This is prophetic and I agree totally with the comments of Ace of Black Hearts especially about reading others poems and commenting on them as this is a very polite way to not only learn but also to conribute to the experiences of other poets and most will genuinely repay the compliment by reading and commenting on your poems as is good manners her on Poem Hunter. (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 0 Points Ace Of Black Hearts (6/9/2013 8:48:00 PM)

    Sometimes, I wonder if we as in humanity are a very smart plague infecting the earth. It is a question of who will die first. The poem is very good and wise. The only mistake I see at all is in line 11 if your not including the white space breaks. And it might not be mistake either. Are you muting a single sound? Or is it multiple sounds. It is all in the interpretation, and with sound you didn't clarify how many so one can only guess or assume. That doesn't make it wrong. You asked and I thought I'd give my opinion. Hope it helps, as far as people reading the poem. I don't know why... My advice is keep writing, but instead of requesting for comments comment on other peoples poems you like you'll be surprised how many will comment back with no request at all. (Report) Reply

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