How Poem by Bill Smith

how does it go
more than friends
but not quite lovers
sure am jealous
of the others
would not work
too much to chance
hell it hurts
to watch you dance
arms around you
holding you close
smile in my direction
standing on his toes
goodnights kill me
you leave on his arm
his boyish grin
his lucky charm
i sit and watch the door close
my heart hits the floor
i'll think of you tonight
like so many nights before
we don't talk about affection
we never mention love
we always change the subject
when push comes to shove
drain my glass of bitter
as the lights come on
been sat alone in dreamland
find everbodies gone
'we're closing mate i'm sorry'
sympathy's stare
pass through the door to outside
to find you standing there
you have a taxi waiting
you offer me your hand
no words of explanation
we both understand
we climb the stairs to your place
tension fills the air
you fumble for the keys
for the first time i'm aware
in all the time i've known you
in all of the goodbyes
not one kiss between us
no silly little lies
i want you more than ever
time is closing in
is this a situation
where it's impossible to win
your door slowly opens
you reach for the light
more than friends
holding back a tear i say goodnight


(2005)