Treasure Island

MAR HOFF


High School Epic


Somewhere, the sun dawns
And shines on inspiration,
Creativity.

But not here - where things
Fall to the influential
Maj'rity and die.

Somewhere, in the world,
Individuality
Is commended

But not here - where things
Too often blend; no single
Voice to left to hear.

Somewhere, there is light
At the end of a dark and
Confusing tunnel

That grows larger with
Each lesson learned until you
Are enlightened.

But that place is not
Here, where your light is burned out
Deliberately

Without your consent.
A veil of uncertainty
Then blocks your vision.

Somewhere in this world,
Heartbreaks are lonely, freedom
Is untapped, scars open.

But not here, where ink
Is spilled from the veins of
Raw, real emotion

Somewhere, trust is felt
With the soul and emitted
Through everlasting love.

But not here - where backs
Are bloodied, soles are worn down
And hearts are shattered.

Here, fair weather friends.
Hope is forcibly vanquished
Upon arrival.

Somewhere, you are not
Left behind, forgotten,
Worthless, or alone.

Submitted: Monday, June 09, 2014

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Topic(s): high school

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  • Tiffany ip (6/9/2014 6:52:00 AM)

    I really enjoyed this poem. The format of it being in a multiple stanza haiku made it very interesting and fun to read. The recurring “Somewhere…But not here” was clever and I thought that added a lot to the poem in terms of relaying a sense of yearning and regret to the audience. The whole poem is well-written and has a lot of accurate imagery that describes certain situations and things in ways that the audience can really relate to. It was easy to understand and had a lot of back stories behind each of the stanzas so that you knew something happened that caused the speaker to feel this certain way but she does not express what those are, which also adds a somewhat of a mystery aspect.
    There isn’t really anything in this poem that I don’t like. I feel it was ended at a very appropriate spot and is pretty fleshed out. Everything she says in this is true and is an accurate representation of how high school is. The way it’s written makes it seem like it’s describing something completely different because the descriptions are so deep and thought-provoking, which it could very well be. I did make one small change to it however, which was switching “friends fair weather” to “fair weather friends.” Overall, I liked it a lot. (Report) Reply

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