High School Epic
They say that you find yourself in high school,
that time will test exactly how long you expected "forever" to be,
that you'll create unforgettable memories with forgettable people,
that you'll figure everything out eventually.
Honestly, I still can't decide if they were right.
I went through my years of high school like I was in a movie,
Like everything that happened was just part of a bigger plan.
So when I started failing Calculus,
And when that boy in the hallway stomped on any sliver of hope I might've had,
It was meant to be.
At least that's what I told myself.
Even when the rift happened,
the moment I understood the futility of it all,
when the image of "friendship" shattered.
Because it didn't matter how loyal you were;
someone could easily turn around and use you like a doormat.
And the awful discovery that your best friend couldn't stand by you,
couldn't stand up for you?
I should have known.
What a disappointment.
It didn't get much better.
When I couldn't get a 2400 on the SAT,
Or a 36 on the ACT,
Or a perfect score on the HSPA,
Or more AP classes than the next guy,
It just wasn't good enough.
But that doesn't mean I didn't learn anything.
I learned that friends will come and go,
I learned how to function on three hours of sleep a night.
I learned that you can't rely on others for your happiness.
I learned that you can't save everyone.
And how to deal with six rejection letters.
But it didn't get much worse.
Because creative writing allowed me to feel,
To release any animosity and anger without repercussions.
And I was getting better.
No one understood, but I liked that they pretended to.
I found friendships under unforeseen circumstances
And caught myself opening up to people I didn't expect to.
But I was okay with that,
Because they weren't the guilty ones.
It wasn't their fault.
And I knew what I was doing with my life.
I was going to save the world, one starfish at a time.
I just had to figure out a way to get there.
I always thought as I grew up, I would understand life more.
But in reality, I've never felt so lost,
and I swear that life was easier before.
Then I realize, I've never been more wrong.
Nothing was ever easy.
I just didn't see the full picture.
Tiffany Ip's Other Poems
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