Gotta Heal Poem by Heart of Ice Die Die Die

I have to be strong,
I have to get better.
Heal heal heal.
It's all I can think about,
it's all I can focus on.
Heal heal heal.
It's my anthom,
my song.
I hear it late at night
when I can't sleep.
Chanting,
whispering in my ear.
That voice telling me
must heal, must get better,
for them.
Must heal, must get better,
for them.
It's all for them,
I'm re-writing my entire life,
bit by bit.
Scribbling out names
and drawing lines through things
that I can't do,
that I can't handle.
This piece of paper
looks like my pen exploded on it.
I have to be strong for them,
I have to.
I need to be able to hold them up
and help them.
Make them be strong,
strong like I'm not.
I won't let them drown,
I won't let them be like me.
Everything is for them,
everything.
Breath, breath, breath.
Heal, heal, heal.
With every breath I take,
I'm healing.
I'm making myself get better,
it's the only chance I've got.
If my arms are covered in scars
how will I pick them up
and put them to bed?
If my legs are so riddled with cuts
they look purple
how will I play tag with them?
If my hips are all ripped up
how will I run?
How will I sleep?
How?
How can I be me
if I'm hiding?
I must heal.
Watch out,
don't get in my way.
'Cuz I'll plow you right down.
They're gunna need me
at the end.

March.-29-10