For Francis Jude Omoto (1982-2006) Poem by Osazee Dankaro

When I think of you,
I do not see you lying on the hospital bed
Hours before your death
I do not hear your voice on my phone
On the morning of your death
Telling me you are fine

I do not see the scars on your stomach
I do not see the expression on your face
As you drink the black liquid bottled from ‘home'

‘Jude is dead' the voice told me
‘We have buried him.'

I see you on your bed
Forcing yourself to eat,
Even if your stomach would hold nothing
I see you lifting your hand to shake mine
With all the strength in you
I see the strength in your eyes turned yellow
I hear the faith of your voice turned hoarse

Even though you died, I know that you lived.
If no other person knows, I do know.
Weighed down by heavy and unimaginable forces
Yet you stuck it out
You struggled, and you succeeded.

I see you now at Faculty,
Queuing for clearance
And asking for directions:
The beginning of a friendship.
I see you now at the classroom, concentrating
Soaking up knowledge
I see you studying,
Day and night
Faculty and Cambridge College
I see you on the notice board
Counting your A's
I see you now at Hall Four
Sharing all you had.

I see you drinking Star
At Coca-Cola
I see you dancing ‘jogodo'
I see you eyeing Joy

I see you with my posters
Campaigning for me without backup
I see you telling me not to give up
I see your shout of joy when I won,
I see your dedication when I resumed

So Jude,
I do not see you dying and be buried
I do not see you in the hospital ill
I do not see all those
I see you striving
I see you fighting
I see you enduring
I see you persevering

On a dark night at 3.00am
Walking back from studying at Faculty
A spirit we beheld, or so you said
A bright shiny light in human shape
That was a few weeks before you died
And you said it portends death
As if you knew.

The forces against us were huge
Yet you found the strength
To go about from day to day
And keep struggling
And from you I found mine too

I see you my friend
I see the life you didn't get to live
I see it all
Yet I refuse to see you dead
No
I only see you
Head high
Walking to class on your favourite shoes and
Starched short sleeved shirt
Making jokes as we hurry along
This how I wish to see you Jude,
Only like this

I see you my friend
It's been eight years,
Yet, I still see you.

18/12/2014
6.05pm