Ali Adamson


EYES: White-Holes


Before you scrape
and erase their marks
when I do read
few letters stick
on your lips
How, I do flow!
in the moist layers
with conscious mind of
some other space
and within no moment
I sink in eyes...
for ages... for lives
going to die
coming to life...
.....
When i return...
coffee is served!

Submitted: Wednesday, May 20, 2009
Edited: Friday, November 29, 2013

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  • Rookie - 573 Points Shahzia Batool (12/19/2013 12:25:00 PM)

    flowing, reading, sinking, dying, living...so much (non-) action is going on in such a brief write...if a few letters can be read and understood before their apparent erasure, then certainly eyes are not merely the white-holes but a channel...i am not sure about my interpretation but it looks so to me...the coffee-serving suddenly comes as a striking of the Big Ben! (Report) Reply

  • Freshman - 1,645 Points Sallam Yassin (11/30/2013 3:11:00 PM)

    in moment u lost in magic of her eyes
    in journey of life time
    but in return your coffee was served
    hot and in time / bright (Report) Reply

  • Veteran Poet - 4,807 Points Bri Edwards (11/29/2013 9:22:00 PM)

    you lost me a bit until the last line. i DO understand coffee is served. is there cake with the coffee? yes? i'll be right over to join you. if you used more punctuation it MIGHT have helped me some to understand; i'm not sure if it would.
    with concious mind of... conscious? oops! an easy mistake to make!
    you invited me to read, i read, and i thank you for sharing. :) yes, the title and the last line i enjoyed.
    p.s. i loved to watch you box on tv years ago. (Report) Reply

  • Rookie P.k Freitas (11/29/2013 8:30:00 PM)

    This is simply stunning write, it just send you to world of beauty... Good work Poet (Report) Reply

  • Gold Star - 23,967 Points Mehta Hasmukh Amathalal (7/2/2009 6:39:00 AM)

    some other space
    and within no moment
    I sink in eyes...
    for ages... for lives
    going to die
    coming to life...
    .....
    When i return......what an imaginationfrom poet... beautiful description.. i loved it...simply 10

    read mine brown eyes (Report) Reply

  • Rookie Sandra Fowler (5/28/2009 4:28:00 AM)

    Do deep thoughts and cups of coffee go together? It is possible
    if two souls have achieved rapport with one another. A poem
    of awareness.10, for you.

    Warm regards,

    Sandra (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 10 Points Ejaz Khan (5/28/2009 3:43:00 AM)

    A beautiful poem, like soft music, enjoyed it, especially the ending. Keep creating!
    Regards (Report) Reply

Read all 36 comments »

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