Michael McParland


Doubting


For the first time now I'm truly doubting reality.
I'm not sure I'm left with a single bit of sanity.
Nothing seems to connect between you and me,
our experiences points of view are all strangely askew.

I don't know what's really real anymore.
I'm doubting everything I remember or even the reality of what I do.
I'm doubting that I ever was a decent person,
or that anybody sees in me a single rhyme or reason.

I don't know what's slightly real anymore.
Which way I've been which way I go I'm doubting evermore.
I doubt myself and know that you can't love me.
How could you when my reality is paper thin and never seemed to properly fit you in.

I doubt that you could love me because even though I thought I only did certain things that hurt you.
I must have done so much more but my brain has now erased it.
I truly doubt my worth of existence or anybodies need for me.
I'm not sure I'll ever straighten out and I'm terrified for all my insanity breaking out.

Submitted: Tuesday, July 22, 2014
Edited: Tuesday, July 22, 2014

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