Denial Poem by faith toney

That girl of his better be something special
she got what I might want
one day I might open my eyes and see
him sitting there staring back at me
that girl who looks at him with subconscious thoughts
she will have the easier way to him than I
I might not want it
but if she has it I cant get it
he better prize her with every smile he gets
and he must thank God ever night for her in his life
she has him wrapped around her finger
where I just have a lost connection
as soon as the call ends he is out of my reach
and as long as I desire impurity
he will stand a country away
where he belongs with his kind
I am one but I also have gone astray
there are people of my kind and same
we think alike
drug users in a way
craving that next hit
but our hit is not lethal
he who I dwell over is with her
talking about who knows what
I will never be on that side to hear
I see her and I smile with such uncovered jealousy
she has not yet taken notice to the way I stare
but soon, very soon will it be recognizable to her
for her to say such words to him
and I will crumble in denial
once more as I do every night saying to myself