Dark Past! ! ! Poem by Compton Wright

At first we had a beautiful relationship that no one could break
Until popularity flooded my thoughts and my alter ego
Feeling like I owned the world inside the palm of my hand
But also destroying what kind of a lover I was becoming to her
Hugging and kissing into heated arguments that erupted the heart
Trying our best to use emotional and verbally abusing each other
Until it ends into an sexual insanity session which made things unhealthy

I was so cold-blooded, empty and pretty much heartless
Flirting and spitting game to ladies that were groupies
To my early poetry that I wrote from out of lies and tricks
Seeing how this might become the spark for self destruction
As she ran at me with a key in her hand and mark me as a victim
Scarring me for life seeing it right beside me every night and morning
Right on my right forearm seeing that the first day that my arm bled hatred

I hated you; spreading dirty rumors that no one wants you to be friends with you
Making sure no man touch you or talk to you like you have AIDS or STD
Treated you like an outcast…wow how so ironic in my lifetime so far
Tried to make things right with her but went past me like I didn’t existed
Days turn into weeks and months than graduation came and parted ways we did
New school, new friends, new experiences and problems as well to come with
Soon three years gone by through us we changed by style, taste and personality
I become from heartless to heart glowing and understanding to other people’s problems
But you become innocent and nice into a complete psycho; mentally insane
Guess you can say I also took her innocence as well as her heart

I felt so guilty when I swear I saw a couple arguing just like we did in the past
Reminded me of my selfish ways of a person and a lover to myself and her
So I wanted to finished what I started and failed to do…apologize to you
I went back to the school that brought hell to my eyes for the first time
As I saw your friends gave me a warm welcome and good vibes all around them
I ask for her best friend of their group as they got her I saw her beautiful face
She looked exactly as she did in her past life that we first caught each other hearts
From a whisper of my name being said from one of her friends brought many flashbacks
Made my former lover shiver in fear, cry insanely and become broken inside
Coming down with a nervous breakdown all of a sudden all became scary

Now I’m a demon of her past that she wished to never see again or witness
Three days after the recovery of the nervous breakdown I call her up to talk
But as I tried to convince her that I changed my ways of a heartless monster
A quote that will haunt me for the rest of my life “you will be the death of me”
She hung the phone never heard from her again only to get a phone call
From her mother who is weeping and crying about her daughter death
Told me it was from suicide with a note saying it was all my fault
Saying if I never saw and spoke to her she would still be alive right now
Screaming from the top of her lungs “Murderer” I collapse on the floor
Shocked and shattered from the news, feeling so devastated from it all

We went from you are the love of my life to you are the demon of my life
Wishing she could saw the true me but now I can’t see her no more
Now I’m a murderer as all of this could have been stop and cast aside
I don’t have to suffer with this guilt in my gut eating me insides
I don’t deserve to live but yet I don’t need to die at all in this world
God let her rest in peace it is the least you could do for me
To stop the suffering and let the healing and salvation begin

Now you all know my dark past from my lifetime so far
So absorb this experience and learn from reading between the lines
And let me leave this horrible past behind us all so we can move on
Into the light where everything is alright where darkness never touches
The lord’s children and the young poets that continue to express their feelings
So you’ll never have to go through pains through this…Dark Past