Creation Of The Sausage Roll Universe? Poem by Sidi Mahtrow

Creation Of The Sausage Roll Universe?



The sausage roll I see
Is a country fair pastry
Where a stick is stuck into the meat
So that one can hold on to this treat.

And like all things that we enjoy,
The best is gone before the pastry
So all that remains is the gooey mess
And a stick that seems to harbor more, not less.

Regardless of how you see it
There must have been a major architeck
To create such a awesome mind bending
Product that keeps going without start or ending.

POET'S NOTES ABOUT THE POEM
The Big Bang -v- The Big Doughnut Theory Mk II (or Long Sausage Roll Theory)

If doughnuts, those with holes not jam
Will not fit your complex plan
Of Mighty Bang
Then I would suggest another twist
To draw within your mind just this:

A sausage roll without the sausage
Long and smooth, it's pastry glossy
So elongated doughnut it becomes
(Hopefully more acceptable to your sums)
Through which galaxies, if pulled
They out the other end, will fall
(Perhaps reduced to cosmic dust
by banging against the pastry crust)

Now if the structure of this roll
Was of one fabric, totally whole
Galaxies could surely roam
All over it's features
Quite at home
Those features curved just like a dish
In or out, just as you wish
Would bend dark space without the risk
Or need of gravity (upon which
your crap theory does in part exist)
And when they get to the other end
They'd fall back through the middle again
(Perhaps reduced to cosmic dust
by banging against the pastry crust)

Now, on emerging at the other end
It is just possible that this roll
Might need to extend slightly
(Perhaps a bit more pastry crust)
To allow some time for the cosmic dust
In transit down the outer husk
To re-form itself into the Universe (As we know it)

So, red shift you want
Red shift you get

Bending light we could forget
For, with a sausage roll of that size
It's more likely something wrong with your eyes

Thus the Universe, and all within
Is never, ever, required
Truly to begin,
(A Much more sensible theory)

Just continued motion from end to end
With a little time to form again, ie:

Across the top and down the middle
What more do you need to solve the riddle?

So to all BB theorists this message I send
To be read twice without any bangs:

All beginnings are also an end
Repeat together: (ALL BEGINNINGS ARE ALSO AN END)

Of a previous state that was, until then
Repeat together: (OF A PREVIOUS STATE THAT WAS, UNTIL THEN)

So true beginnings we never will have
Repeat together: (SO TRUE BEGINNINGS WE NEVER WILL HAVE)

And trying to prove it will drive us all mad!
Repeat together: (AND TRYING TO PROVE IT WILL DRIVE US ALL MAD!)

So now have you digested that?

There was no beginning

Just a change or a step

The beginning?

You imagined

But could then not forget

June 2005



Egal Bohen
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