Closed Doors Poem by Joyce Rugg

The front door opens,
Stumbling footsteps come in
High-pitched giggling laughter
Drifts through these dirty halls
I smell her before I see
Her clothes, hair, skin, awash
With scent that clings like second skin,
Sharp and bitter, disgusting

It makes me want to gag
When she pulls me close,
Yet those moments are so rare
That I don't want to see them end
So I endure,
Hide my face in her foul-smelling locks
Look away so she won't see disgust,
Written so plainly on my face

But her hand grips my arm,
Too late, she's seen
Laughter turns to fury
As eyes blaze through the haze

One slap, then another,
Screaming, angry words
That I know I deserve,
Because I wasn't good enough,
I never am

Suddenly rage evaporates,
Leaving dizziness in it's wake
As I try to find my breath
And put my heart back in place

A thunderous tread shakes floorboards,
And the giggling stranger is back
She stands up, teeters, goes to him

He catches her as she stumbles,
And they walk away from me,
Mommy and grandpa disappear,
Like they always do, closing the door
Behind
The vengeful angel leaves,
I, the demon,
Left staring at the face of her that I know best