Closed Book Poem by Joshua Hillard

Closed Book



So here we are again,
Befuddled on where we are,
This persistent, anomalistic pain,
A soul is stained; it's gone too far,

I close these dreams,
This book remains shut,
Too many times; not enough lines,
Director finally yells "CUT! "
Even the beginning had to stop,
No re-runs were an option of choice,
I shook His hand to feel His cold,

Never fully understood the sound to His voice.
It was a given; for I'm living,
Just another sold out tale,
Another rejection in the market,
No pick-ups to begin this sale,

No distributions to contribute,
No name or a release to send me home,
Nothing but a journey into emptiness,
Feel the fire consume me whole,

I jumped to the gun,
The pen was handed to me,
It was my turn to write a story,
Something small of a biography,

Pen was going, no dotted lines,
Seems as if I had the time,
Then a hand reached in and pulled,
Before I finished … Upon a time…

As if the story had proclaimed,
These feelings I've disdained,
For the words I spoke, I do dare choke,
I'm alone, head down, feeling ashamed.

How I continue in an empty chorus,
No Author, nor I even speaking the truth,
The world is inevitable,
Why forget me, when it's always forget you,

Oh sweet shifting sorrow,
Gentle breeze squeeze in every crack,
No seal to prevent, but life to regret,
How do I ever find my way back?

The pen is my goal, my passion to persist,
You took from me, bleed to me,
I bleed to you, but what do I do,
When lies fill the air I breathe,

Take a breath, relax, and let's inhale,
The air is around, surround, no pause or to break,
I take my breath to read what I wrote,
Only to find myself staring at an empty page.

Let me write, please let me speak,
So many words bottling in my ink,
Even if blood must be my words to write,
Know that it's me, for feelings I can't think.

I write my page but in my heart,
Shut down so cold, labeled invalid,
Dream now of what to dream,
A love scene ending in a face so tragic.

Thursday, November 27, 2014
Topic(s) of this poem: sad
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