Mark Bratlie

I lay in bed with one eye open
As my dreams all crashed in ruins
Wondering just who to blame
For choosing such horrendous tunes

The DJ's evil voice came through
Welcoming us to the day
I'm sure he is a terrorist
To bring such misery my way

Forget the work that must be done
Forget appointments that were made
Upon this mattress I will stay
Close the curtains, draw the shade

I'm not gettin' out of bed
Someone set the clock ahead
It can't be Monday, no-sir-ree
It's just one great conspiracy

If I get up it's sure to happen
Something bad will come to be
As soon as my feet hit the floor
An accident's awaiting me

Should I need another reason
I'm not feeling up to snuff
My back is sore, my head is aching
You know I sure am feeling tough

Were a doc to look me over
I know what he would recommend
Bedrest he would strictly order
Until this day comes to an end

If anything needs getting done
Tomorrow will be soon enough
Postpone the shower and the shave
Breakfast and the other stuff

I'm not gettin' out of bed
Someone set the clock ahead
It can't be Monday, no-sir-ree
It's just one great conspiracy