Brothers In Each Others' Arms Poem by Thomas Bates

little by little, of course i saw and watched the teardrops
trickle
down your pale face,
exchanging form for alternating form
heading downward
in the preciousness
of true sadness from
a tenderly hurt heart.
nothing seemed right in this long moment
of your vulnerability.
i'd rushed after you
when you had ran from me
outdoors and beneath a blackened sky above,
crying it's own storm
of tears and thunder.
the previously clear, soft and promising sky
only hours before, and
the intensity of rains' timely disorder
fittingly
moved in above,
now shedding emotional pathos to our situation.

you sat, crying in that darkness around us
on a bench,
handing me a warning by way of shame which
engulfed me there, my brother,
holding your hand in mine
and unable to move away from the strain
that that year had been hard on you, too,
in school and in home.
i'd chosen the worst time possible
to tease and flaberghast you, your brother who'd been
overstepping not just my ground
but my decency.
i'd lived with the funny stupid idea
that a little pitiful torture
had place in relationships,
brothers being slightly cruel to one
another, a practicle joking of sorts
meant
to keep the younger of the two on his feet.
i loved you then -as i certainly still do,
and i'm sorry i hurt you;
an apology after the passing of years
in order
as i recall these details.
you've since claimed to have forgotten the details
and, in fact, the incident
which does
nothing to help me in forgiving myself,
nor in the forgiveness you have blessed me with
most possibly years ago,
whether or not
you remember the teasing of such unkind incidents a little, still,
or - possibly - not at all, maybe some day ui tell me.