Braggadocio Poem by P.R. Prosper

I am everything
Man, I am everything
I reign more than clouds
I am above every king

I’m a gentleman and a truant
From the streets to the scholars
All tongues, I speak them fluent
It’s better to ask whom I haven’t influenced
A challenge to most, to me is a nuisance

I’ve got more heart than surgeons
Working on Valentine’s
My heroism is a burden
My courage the paradigm

Loose fitting, I’m never slackin’
I’ve got more guts than Patton
On Friday with Jason Voorhees
I’m sharper than Krueger’s knives
Or Jigsaw’s allegories
With wit that Shakespeare couldn’t write into a story
I could sit and do nothing and still capture all the glory

I’ve got more swagger than a billion bucks
Rapping about investments
On Wall Street, my piggy bank’s anatomy’s a lesson
Because my riches are filthier than a swine’s intestines
In testing out my theory of how fly one man can be
I went to the Amazon and walked on the canopy
Some doubted me and dared to say I couldn’t do it
But I gross so much my bank account is in the sewage

It isn’t all just fun and games
I have more problems and more troubles
Than people and streets have names
I’ve been through more drama than daytime soaps
Washed away my hopes and
Flushed them with a hand of poker and dope
But the way I flow, most say ice cold
Never fails to put lava to shame
I’m more than a warning about global warming
I’m what the world would be in flames


Seeing more red than rubies
I couldn’t be calmer if I smoked 10 doobies
I’m photographed more than tourists on duty
‘Cause I have more style than martial arts movies
The master of drunken masters
I’m more gripping than judo
When it comes to bearing arms, I pop eyes like Bluto
I attract more stars than stadiums
And glow more than radium
So much that Mickey sees my shine from Pluto

I’m cooler than Freon
And since I’m the limelight
I can’t dodge the neon
My diamond mind is always grindin’ clearer than the jewelers
Give me just an inch and you will see me rule the rulers
They’re nosier than tubas while marching like a Sousa
One hit from me and they’ll be more stoned than Medusa

My story is an epic
It soothes the apoplectic
But I’m so nice and humble
That I will let you tell it