Birds Of A Feather, F$#k Together Or Gertrude And Heathcliff, Where Are You? Poem by Joe Rosochacki

What was I thinking?
I though that some humans were predisposed to homosexuality, bi-sexuality,
Some people even engage in bondage and dominance; whips and/or leather.
The Neo-Nazis in Deutschland, that Gay-Rights activists may call them,

German zookeepers are forcing two male vultures who prefer nesting
together to mate with females, sparking outrage from gay rights activists
who accuse the zoo of discriminating against birds of a different feather.

In the German month of March,
'Spring Time for Hitler and Germany',
(A song from 'The Producers' came in mind)
The time when fowl, excuse me foul weather is ending,
And the future days, for the next five months, is better weather.

The trouble began back in March, when Guido and Detlef, (not Gertrude and
Heathcliff,) two Griffon vultures, (not two seagulls) decided to move in together.

They had a longing for each other,
Though they were males,
They built a home without nails,

The lovebirds began crafting a two-man nest out of stray twigs in a
communal birdcage at their zoo in the town of Munster, .....

I wonder if South Beach had this kind of 'Birdcage',
Which starred Robin Williams and Nathan Lane,
Which movie critics did hail.

Both birds are predatory males, but seemed to enjoy one another's
company more than that of any female.

Giudo and Detlef would be put to the test,
Some vultures approached them with vindictiveness
-and they thought that Guido and Detlef were vermin.

They, (Giudo and Detlef) spent their days grooming one another with their
beaks and fortifying their nest
- though other vultures occasionally stole
their building materials, as if to spite them.

'They always sat so closely together. They defended their nest
from the other vultures, ' the zoo's curator, Dirk Wewers, ....

So much for the mating call of the yellow belly sap suckers by bird watching viewers.

Detlef was not happy (feet, I'll explain later) being alone,
I can see him singing the Beatle tune 'I'll Cry Instead'

But Wewers explains their preference for one another as second-best.
'A suitable female was missing and in such a case vultures look for
companionship from the next best thing, even if it is a male, ' the zookeeper said.
Who could've guess or who would know?
'Detlef looked for a bird of the opposite sex but settled with Guido.'

Poor Guido.

But the two of them were ready to settle down and rock 'n' roll,
Until-

Zookeepers decided that Guido and Detlef's living arrangements
weren't helping that (their) goal.

The zoo keepers wanted to increase the griffin vulture population,
That was their intention, so-

So last week, Guido was snatched from his partner and
shipped 400 miles east to a zoo in the Czech Republic,
where a new bride awaited him.

This was a extreme case of 'birdnapping'?
Was the ransom to be paid in grain filled to the brim?

Was Detlef being made to conform to popular norms,
-rules to obey and penalties that are stiff

In his (Guido's) place is a Czech temptress whom zookeepers hope can seduce Detlef.

Detlef and the Czech bird are acting though as a sister and brother,
Barring their aren't red-necks,

'Detlef is reorienting himself now, ' Wewers told the Telegraph.
But he acknowledged that so far, Detlef and the Czech bird haven't
touched one another.

And speaking of the amorous adventures of aviaries, including the dove,

Gay rights activists held a small demonstration in front of the zoo,
waving a rainbow flag and decrying the zookeepers for standing in
the way of love.

The gay activists are hoping and praying

'This is like in the dark middle ages, forcibly making a creature sexually
re-orient itself by tearing its partner from its side, ' The German Herald quoted one protester as saying.

Don't ask, don't tell,
Pal.

Others said they worried that what's happened to the birds could one day
happen to humans as well.

Guido and Detlef aren't the first gay couple from the animal kingdom to make headlines.

Way back when, about seven years ago

Two gay male penguins, Harry and Pepper, started living together at the San
Francisco Zoo (where else) in 2003, and five years later adopted, incubated and
hatched an egg abandoned by a female penguin, Time magazine reported.
(Happy Feet then) But their romance didn't last. Last year, Harry left Pepper
for a recently widowed female, Linda.
(No Happy Feet now for Pepper no more bliss) .
'They call me Dr. (Love) ' Pepper said with a KISS.

11/27/10


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