Apudo Apudo


Better Scars


Behold my skin and my scars
They embrace one another
Like the twilight sky and the stars
Like there was no before; no after

Take a look at my battle scars
You can go ahead and laugh
They are testaments to my labour
Abiding ornaments to my triumph

Respect my callous scars
They conceal a pristine interior
Bruised and buried in the war
Tenderness lying in wait, never afar

My scars don't take cover under my garment
They stand and confront the midday sun
Like white sand washed up on the seafront
And I, am not obliged to run

I have better scars
They cannot be awaken or scared
I have stronger scars
They cannot be peeled back

Submitted: Wednesday, May 01, 2013
Edited: Thursday, May 02, 2013

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  • Freshman - 1,353 Points Kay Staley (8/25/2014 11:52:00 AM)

    Weakness: Shaking or nonexistent lyrical rhyme scheme. Needs raw emotion, feeling, drastical language, etc. Its to formal with the words like garment, labor, and triumph. Strength: Its a good idea, and the first paragraph is the best....write more like it and then you will have a real poem. (Report) Reply

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