Bathroom Mat Poem by Leaking Pen

Bathroom Mat



What can my fatigued mind do?
When sleep abandons its thoughts
And restlessness moves in instead
Colouring its nights with worries
And this constant nagging pain,
And the taste of dryness on my tongue
Feeding cancerous lumps in my throat,
And the breath of life from my lungs
Snuffed out without guilt about my mom's love.
You raped me
You imprisoned me
You silenced my heart
You suffocated my spirit
You nailed me on a wall of invisible emptiness,
And like a thief in plain daylight
You victimized me
Over and over again.
How can I afford to bleed any more?
When my blood is frozen?
Its not the physical abuse that hurts the most,
But your silent neglects of who I am.
Your lovemaking is like a dead end street,
Cold, mechanical and remote
Unlike to the other, where your pulse beats fast,
In lovemaking late, late at night,
Under covers from your laptop
On the hunt from harlot to harlot websites
And your eye's drool from lust,
And one of your hands finds its way to your crotch
Stroking wide open the doors of self-love
With intensities once only shared with mine,
And your breaths with passion and lust erupts
Which once were our joint domain
When you first trapped me with your addiction,
And now like a bathroom mat
You step on me with dirty feet.
I witness the guiltless stains you leave behind,
When you toss them in our clothes hamper
The evidence from last night's secretive acts,
And for me to wash you lust stains away.
And back to this cycle all over again.
How can I cut this lock open?
That binds me with your invisible key
Hiding inside your cruelty.
The oath I took on our wedding day,
For better or worse…
Fate has determined my walk.
I wait for my reward in heaven.

August 28th 2011
Copyright Leaking Pen 2011
Revised Nov 4th 2014

Wednesday, September 5, 2012
Topic(s) of this poem: lust
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Leaking Pen

Leaking Pen

Wellington, New Zealand
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