All The Wrongs Poem by David Knox

No really
Literally
I think I love you
You make me so excited too
When I'm around you I just want to sing, sing love songs
But I can't help but consider all the wrongs

I don't know if I love you, girl I don't know what love is
When I look at myself I'm disgusted 'why would anyone be his? '
Aren't you? even if not, if you saw what I see
Wouldn't you hate me?
I don't understand, I don't want to talk to me...but you do
It almost seems like you care too
I'm just not good enough for you, this is all I got
Just not

But there's so much more
Yes there's a lot of me to abhor
But I'm also not ready
I just cant handle being in a relationship,
I'm not even comfortable being me
I can't even get a grip

But there's so much more
Yes there's a lot of me to abhor
But also what about faith
Do you believe what I do?
Can I have fellowship with you?
What about the deepest relationship of all
We have to share that or we'll just fall
Even if you do, I bet I can guarantee
The problem again is me
I'm not ready, we'd be unequally yoked, because I'm well, I'm me.

But there's so much more
Yes, there's a lot of me to abhor
I don't want you to love me
I desire your love more than I desire life
And yet I want YOUR life to be rife
With happiness and true love, can't you see
Since I love you I don't want you to love me
Since I love you I want someone else for you
Since I love you I want what's best for you too
That's not me
So Since I love you (or so I convince myself) don't love me.

But there's so much more
Yes, there's a lot of me to abhor
But also lust
Maybe it's excitement, maybe it's really sinful, sorry to disgust
You, but I desire you
In a bad way too
Not often, and surely this is why I hate myself
But there are times when I allow these desires just to engulf
Me, they take over, and so your looks get in the way
Because you're gorgeous, but I want to love for who you really are
Can I really do that? With my scar?
I want to really love you I say...
Really, I want to love, I don't want this lust, I can't separate the two
I'm sorry, I don't know if I could ever make it up to you
I'm sorry, so sorry for the lust
I'm sorry, so sorry, sorry for me.