A Trip Poem by David DeSantis

A Trip

Rating: 4.9


My feet in the sand.

The shoreline
Of a beach,
Glass bottles,
And rock worn
Edges.

Contemptuous gaze
And an air ward sigh.
My thoughts consumed
by
weekend recitations.

Such high hopes
This time.
Years of trying
And finally a get away.

New York City
and love.

Yet
one is attained,
The other lost.

Coarse sand grain fists
Become open palms,
As a smooth sea shell
Drops from my hand.

Head shaking desperation.

How easily
It slips away.

Copyright (c) David DeSantis

COMMENTS OF THE POEM

Mental visions of an egg-timer going on here. How easily time, love and life slip away indeed... carpe diem. t x

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LOVEFOOL Aka 27 May 2008

Very nice quite sentimental good stuff Nik

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Greenwolfe 1962 27 May 2008

I am one who will freely admit that some poems are just too vague for me to follow. I do this, not because I can't tell where the author is going necessarily. But because I know that most of those who read it are not going to get much out of it. This is one of those times. I suppose its clear in the general sense, but that can't explain all the elements contained within it. Now I know, it's not supposed to in this modern era. But this poem is going to, hopefully, be read beyond the present time. At least, I'm sure that's the author's wish. I hope, it's the readers as well. GW62

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Onelia Avelar 27 May 2008

The beginning and the end of the poem form a circle; it starts with the feet in sand, goes through different images and ends with slipping away...sandy poem, well penned again...

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Abha Sharma 27 May 2008

The grain, the fist, the seaside imagery all suggest a deep metaphor…like the sand and the sea our hopes are born and soon we find them slipping away so easily… A unique imagery, philosophical lines Abha

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Flora Gillingham 10 June 2008

A wonderful snapshot of time and emotion. Just enough detail. Enjoy the journey. Fx

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Catherine Rica Cosico 07 June 2008

To attain something you have to sacrifice one thing...thats the rule of life...Great poem, David. Simple and meaningful... Cate

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Original Unknown Girl 02 June 2008

Wonderful penning. Love the imagery, especially the sand slipping through your fingers. This is great. Love will come along when it's ready, when you're ready and not before (but you can have so much fun searching for it until then! !) HG: -) xx

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Alison Cassidy 31 May 2008

You give the reader just enough (but not too much) information in this reflective piece about starting afresh. Love the sand in the hand metaphor - and the 'rock worn edges' of your beach. Sometimes a change of scenery is a wonderful antidote to angst and too much thinking. love, Allie ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

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R H 29 May 2008

Strong imagery that reinforces the idea that time is being eroded, we can dream, we can grasp those dreams or we can lose sight of them and let the grains of time slip through our fingers... this one has your deeply introspective tag on it David. j.

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