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(May 25th,1995)

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12 Years

So here it is, the ending 12 years
a 14 year sonnet subtracted by two
12 years of memories, of loves, of loss
12 years of friendships, of laughs, of sobs
here it is, the ending
I can't say I'm impressed nor depressed
see the way I have expressed
my departure from this crazy facility
I'm too overjoyed, jumping off my feet
doing cartwheels in my sleep
when slumber finally rolls in
yelling, screaming how I am finally free
to do as I please
with a gigantic smile upon my face
cause I know I won't miss this God forsaken place
though darkening like the sky
when the rain clouds clumsily clump around the sun
is the image of Scarlett Jade
sitting her usual corner without a smile
a smile faded into my faded jeans pocket
It's not about me, it's a lie fit to deceive
I love her
don't care who knows, don't care who tries to convict me for it
I love her
and in all ecstatic glory
I feel my own eyes start to swell, I'm alone
the red shown is the only inaudible confession
of her passing through my mind once more
The felt moment of her embrace, of her touch
told me mutely of the words she couldn't speak
even though she proposed she spoke them all
although I'm aware there's more to be shared
on both sides
but with sore shoulders I must raise my head
and be the first to speak
...just not today
I'm not ready today
for fear I may become stormy eyed
and stay, refuse to remove myself from her arms
I'd rather bask in the sun
and celebrate the last Friday
of a 12 year fiasco
of a 12 year endeaver
of a 12 year mayday parade
of a 12 year adventure
12 years,12 years; I guess I grew up here...

Submitted: Saturday, May 18, 2013
Edited: Wednesday, September 11, 2013


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Poet's Notes about The Poem

Made on 5/17/13; my last day of full day of high school

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