Phoenix Strezze

A journey lies ahead
for all teenagers today.
A journey to adulthood,
our youth to kiss away.
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I'm a survivor of sexual, physical, and mental abuse for many years. I've searched for help from a lot of people and nobody has figured out my signs and yelling out of attention for help.

I'm a survivor cutting and being suicidal. taking 17 pills of seraquel in September 2007 almost dieing in the hospital with my family sitting next to me as i lay there half asleep almost dieing.
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I love him
but he doesn't love me
I hate to be in this position
why can't we ever be
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When I was little, I wanted to be a mommy, but heard being a mommy is too difficult.
I have to work hard and for a long time, and just think I can't do that.
I'm scared, I'm scared to fail.
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One day I woke up and saw you just sitting there to watch over me. That day I saw the glow all around her. I remember her from some where but I'm not sure where. She loved me when that day came when I woke up and saw her there watching over me. I was frightened and she said unto me 'Do not be afraid my child i am here to tell you its time to take care of yourself. I will still watch over you, but remember I love you.' Then the sweet woman disappeared. I remember her that's my angel who died of cancer.


Dedicated to:
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I wear a mask that changes every mood.
I laugh sometimes to hide the truth.
I cry in my sleep to hide the shame.
I lie to myself to hide the blame.
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Thank you for the laughter, for the good times that we share.
Thanks for always listening, for trying to be fair.

That you for your comfort, when things are not so good.
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One day I will be free, as free as I wanna be. To be free is to be happy. I wish I can be free, away from all people, bars, and locks.

noone wants me to be free. i cry at night on my hard springy bed, just praying that I will be free. When I wake in the morning light, I wish I'm dead so I will at least be free in my own spirit.
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Who's to blame,
for this awful game?
Who's to blame,
for the ways things became?
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