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Poetics and Poetry Discussion


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  • Rookie - 589 Points Jefferson Carter (7/1/2013 12:03:00 PM) Post reply | Read 1 reply
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    Alice, pretty cool. Here are some suggestions for nip-and-tuck revisions. Good poem.

    KNIGHT IN RUSTED ARMOR


    He comes home in an old green suburban
    Around six in the morning

    Drives round and round the block
    Looking for a space to park

    He limps up the iron stairs
    This battle weary and scarred

    Short man with a large heart
    Steps into my waiting arms

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    • Rookie - 589 Points Alice Vedral Rivera (7/1/2013 12:20:00 PM) Post reply

      Thanks JC. I think I'll use your revisions. It won't have the same sound and limping rhythm (intentional) when I recite it but it still sounds good and I like the tightness.

  • Rookie - 758 Points Lamont Palmer (7/1/2013 8:36:00 AM) Post reply

    Last two lines say it all. All the knights are flawed, but thank goodness for them. -LP

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