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Poetics and Poetry Discussion


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  • Mike Acker Rookie - 1st Stage (9/20/2014 5:05:00 PM) Post reply

    'Palmer" , I thought it would be interesting to see who these " supportive critics" of yours are. Just like I thought, the first one, Patricia Grantham, has quite a ways to go before we can qualify her as a legitimate critic. Here is an example of her poetry:

    Child's Play
    by Patricia Grantham

    When the children goes outside to play
    So happy just to see a brand new day
    They're color blind in each and every way
    In love and peace or come whatever may

    Love can come in all kinds of shade
    Like the hues sparkling from the rainbow
    In the image of God is how we are made
    Called the human race that we all know

    After running or playing hide and go seek
    Hungry, tired they're all humble and meek
    Learning from them we can unite as one
    Child's play goes on until the day is done

    Moving on....

    You
    by Heather Wilkins(Burns)

    The
    mysteries
    of you
    entice me

    to
    search
    deeper
    into your
    existence.

    You haunt
    my
    daydreams
    with your
    unknown.

    I phantom
    you
    into
    reality.

    Need I say more???

    I don't want to embarrass anyone else. My issues are with your lack of talent, but you drew them into this.

    Just face it Palmer, after 45 years of reading and writing poetry, you should be further along

  • Lamont Palmer Rookie - 1st Stage (9/20/2014 1:56:00 PM) Post reply

    'Acker', is there anyone who is trying to create mediorce poetry?If a poet isn't trying to pen great poems, he shouldn't be writing at all. No, you may not get there, but you should be making attempts. If my poems strike you as 'efforts' at greatness, then you are unwittingly saying that you see remnants there of that effort. I certainly cannot say I see that effort in you, as your poems strike me as lazy and slack. And by the way, you didn't post the comments on that poem. I'll take their opinions over yours, as what they say mirrors the effect I was striving for. In other words, they got it. Thanks for the 'critique', such as it was. -LP

    Enter the verification code:


    Patricia Grantham (9/7/2013 7: 51: 00 AM)
    A very refreshing poem. We can never get rid of the inner child
    that lies in us. It keeps us feeling alive and youthful whenever we
    choose to act that way. Enjoyed the fantasy. (Report) Reply



    Heather Wilkins (8/3/2013 12: 31: 00 PM)
    love this one. we all have inner children (Report) Reply



    Michael Morgan (8/2/2013 3: 22: 00 PM)
    Deserves the 10. Very fresh. MM (Report) Reply



    Dave Walker (7/31/2013 2: 56: 00 PM)
    A great poem, like it. (Report) Reply



    Read all 4 comments »

  • Shifty Moriarty Rookie - 1st Stage (9/20/2014 11:55:00 AM) Post reply

    pyre
    dude
    pyre

  • Mike Acker Rookie - 1st Stage (9/20/2014 11:29:00 AM) Post reply | Read 1 reply

    @Lamont Palmer

    Being desperate to write without the triteness you mentioned, I went, well, poem-hunting. I ran across this " original" piece. I can't for the life of me recall the name of the writer. Maybe he(or she) can step forward and claim authorship.
    - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
    Peter Principle
    (not written by me, thank god)

    It’s a complete fantasy.
    A fantasy of a fantasy, =(cliched, and trite all at the same time)
    A generalization of yellow =(it is clear here that poet was seeking originality and when none would come naturally, he created it artificially! Originality can't be manufactured)
    Open roses.

    We’ve said things with aplomb, ideas =(big word for Big Bird, falls flat and heavy..where is the music, Palmer?)
    Centering around hope and urges:
    (me getting under your sun dress,
    you getting under my skin) =(to me these side comments you include in your poems are silly and show a clear lack of maturity on the part of the poet)

    And all for naught, all under the assumption
    That you and I are wondrous
    Exceptions, to turn around what needs to be

    Turned, the isolation of shooting stars.
    Such silliness I thought I’d left behind; such
    Are inner children, caught in J.M. Barrie’s tale.
    - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
    I will say with honesty that your soul is not that of a poet, but rather a pompous a$$, desperately yearning to produce " great" poetry.

    Replies for this message:
    • Lamont Palmer Rookie - 1st Stage (9/20/2014 2:55:00 PM) Post reply

      Yes, that was a playful poem. That's pretty obvious. Your problem is, you don't recognize wordplay and inventiveness. You're too busy trying to make maudlin points. -LP

  • Shifty Moriarty Rookie - 1st Stage (9/20/2014 4:35:00 AM) Post reply

    dire dude dire

  • Mike Acker Rookie - 1st Stage (9/20/2014 3:34:00 AM) Post reply | Read 1 reply

    Broken Wombs(as reply)

    Replies for this message:
    • Mike Acker Rookie - 1st Stage (9/20/2014 3:34:00 AM) Post reply

      Broken Wombs Where does it lie? Does it lie here, or there? It lies where it lies; neither ahead nor behind. It lies inside my eyes, it lies inside the flies. It lies in mirages of oases ... more

  • Frank Ovid Rookie - 1st Stage (9/19/2014 9:38:00 PM) Post reply

    I'm trying to decide between CougarLife.com and DateRussians.com. Both look very interesting. Has anyone tried these websites?You know, give me a little advice.

  • Jefferson Carter Rookie - 1st Stage (9/19/2014 9:07:00 PM) Post reply | Read 1 reply

    Lamont, I really don't help from Acker. I just want you to answer three questions: 1) That old but unanswerable chestnut, what is poetry? You keep saying I defy definitions everyone else agrees on, but such definitions don't exist. If, as you suggested, " The Great Gatsby" were broken into lines, what essential quality would keep it from being poetry? 2) What do you mean by music? Strict meter? Alliteration?Rhyme? Music has to do with sound, with form, not content. Why is one rhythm better than another? Why are you so hung up on iambic meter?Doesn't every line have rhythm of some sort? 3) You've said the more " formal poetic devices" a poet uses, the better the poem. I know the plain style eschews rhyme and strict meter, but don't the best plain-spoken poets use such figures of speech as similes and metaphors?

    I've been thinking about why I dislike so many plain-style poems I've been reading lately. You're going to faint, but I agree the plain style has fostered the worst kind of flat, uninteresting verse. The chopped-into-lines personal memoirs I hate are prosaic, not because they lack music (though the music supplied by lines breaks in the hands of a good poet like Williams is both subtle and expressive and is absent from the works I despise) but because they lack vivid, precise imagery and original, profound figures of speech; it's their content that sucks, not so much their form.

    Replies for this message:
    • Lamont Palmer Rookie - 1st Stage (9/20/2014 8:52:00 AM) Post reply

      JC, I didn't faint, but you just proved you knew what the heck I was talking about all the time. Your grudging admission (I feel like an attorney breaking down a witness on the stand) about the failu ... more

  • Frank Ovid Rookie - 1st Stage (9/19/2014 8:50:00 PM) Post reply | Read 1 reply

    I just went to a poem by Henry Wadsworth Longfellow and I noticed there was an icon to " Edit Poem" . I clicked it and did a little " cleaning up" for " The Wad" (what his close friends refer to him as) . Yeah, I noticed the poem needed some work, so I helped him out. I changed a few lines around. Not much.

    Replies for this message:
  • Mike Acker Rookie - 1st Stage (9/19/2014 5:19:00 PM) Post reply | Read 2 replies

    Figurines

    Figures dance, as dark shadows against
    silk shrouds. Some charge, chase, and chivy,
    others are felled, fleeced and flitched

    What fate awaits me?Is it
    the figurine, or just a black
    silhouette against the shrewd silk screen?

    Mike Acker

    Replies for this message:
    • Mike Acker Rookie - 1st Stage (9/20/2014 11:23:00 AM) Post reply

      Being desperate to write without the triteness you mentioned, I went, well, poem-hunting. I ran across this " original" piece. I can't for the life of me recall the name of the writer. Ma ... more

    • Lamont Palmer Rookie - 1st Stage (9/20/2014 9:13:00 AM) Post reply

      'Dark Shadows' was a TV show back in the 70's. But even before then, 'dark shadows' was still a terrible cliché. 'What fate awaits me'?So melodramatic, 'Acker'. You've got the soul of a poet, but you ... more

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